When Children Hurt
Most often we think of children as little ones. Although, as adults, we are still the children of our parents. As adult children, it is painful to see our parents age. Once our rock and foundation, we depended on their wisdom to solve all the worldly problems. Now, it hurts to see that their end is near as their health, mobility and mental sharpness start to dissipate. The slow decline in their independence is inevitable. They become unsure of themselves, which in turn restricts their lives.
Daily activities are routine, because anything out of the ordinary may set in place a chain of terror. Their golden years start to mesh into days of doctor appointments and scheduled medications. It is devastating to watch
Their taste buds are not as keen, spicy food upset the stomach, and meals become challenging with fewer teeth. It is much easier to open a box or can instead of fixing a balanced meal. Even stairs are a nightmare; one more cause for falling and bruising. A broken hip can cause a domino effect of health issues resulting in death.
Forgetfulness is frustrating for both you and your parents. Simple things from finding keys and important papers to paying bills and remembering special dates are aggravating traumas. Hours are spent fruitlessly looking for something that is right in front of them. Being repeatedly asked the same question is annoying. To the forgetful parent, they don’t understand why you don’t want to answer their questions.
Worry overcomes the adult children’s minds asking questions, “What do I do if my parents are not able to care for themselves anymore? How do I make sure that their last days are lived with dignity? How will I cope with losing my parents?” As adult children, the process of making important decisions for parents is an agonizing anguish. It is hard to know if one is doing the right thing until it is done. Then it may be too late. So who knows? Meanwhile, that fear shadows each decision. The feeling of helplessness is aspirating, but there is no time to feel sorry for oneself.
Be sure not let these important decisions overwhelm the situation. Cherish each day, no matter what the struggles may be. Reassure your parents that they are not a burden and will be loved unconditionally until their very last breath. You will have time to grieve after they are gone; now is not the time.
By preparing all the necessary legal documents ahead of time, it will help set everyone’s mind at ease during your parent’s journey through their golden years. Knowing their requests will gracefully merge the bridge to their final wishes.
Will this hurt ever end? Probably not. There will always be a void in your life that only your parents can fill. Time will ease the pain, but fond memories keep will keep their legend alive.
Stevee Ashlock resides in Atlanta, Georgia, USA. She has been in the entertainment business for over twenty-five years and is the owner of Stoneybrook Productions, an entertainment production and multi-media marketing company. http://www.stoneybrookproductions.net
Ms. Ashlock is dedicated to her international charity involvement, focusing on women and children issues.
You may contact Ms. Ashlock at stoneybrookprods@prodigy.net
Tags: aging patents, dying with dignity, memories, prepare for death
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